"Gimme two fingers of your best sippin' liquor, Miss Lola, and make it the smooth stuff. The stuff where you get your eyesight back after two days, guaranteed."
-Sheriff Kryten (RD: Gunmen of the Apocalypse)

Lola was the barmaid at the Last Chance Saloon.

Dream Woman

When Kryten contracted the Armageddon Virus, he hallucinated himself as the sheriff in an American frontier town called Existence. The saloon where the sheriff liked to drink himself into unconsciousness was run by a formidable looking woman known as Miss Lola.

Lola was a large woman dressed as a typical saloon girl from the American west. She wore a frilly red and black dress, lots of jewellery and plenty of make-up. She had a feathery hairclip and two beauty spots on her face.

She treated Sheriff Kryten with a small amount of contempt, since he would come into the saloon to drink his troubles away. When Jimmy and his cronies picked on the sheriff, she did nothing to intervene. Kryten offered to sell her all of his worldly possessions in exchange for a bottle of "Mindrotter" whiskey. These included his revolvers and the carrots belonging to his mule, Dignity.

Lola poured whiskey for her customers by pulling the cork from the bottle with her teeth and pouring all the glasses together. The whiskey was violently powerful, stripping the vocal chords of the uninitiated. When Rimmer asked her for ginger ale to mix with his whiskey, she spat the cork in his face. He assumed that to be a no.

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