Tongue Tied

Phwoaarr is the first "lost episode" of Series VIII, the second being "Earth". The script was written by Paul Alexander but never filmed.


The Canaries investigate yet another Space Corps derelict spaceship to discover that the inhabitants had been testing new pheromone-based perfumes.

The Canaries enter to find that the perfume has an effect on human desire very much like the sexual magnetism virus. In fact it works a little too well, and the Boys from the Dwarf discover the crew are now a pile of naked, dead bodies, having had sex until they died. The perfume would have ended up with Arnold Rimmer and Kristine Kochanski having sex, and Dave Lister trying to kill him in a jealous rage.


  • A similar scene of postmortem debauchery, albeit this time only presented through skeletons, was shown in the later Series XI episode "Samsara".

Behind the Scenes

  • The episode was ultimately unproduced as Doug Naylor felt it was a little too inappropriate (in a series already criticized for its lewd tone). It was replaced (chronologically) by the episode "Krytie TV", but "Phwoaarr" is still described in the Series VIII booklet.
  • The idea of Rimmer (almost) getting amorous with Kochanski, and Lister going to kill him in a jealous rage, was written over instead to an earlier episode in the series, "Cassandra".