Tongue Tied

The Rimmer Experience

"It's a museum to Mr. Rimmer's memory, I made it myself. If anyone finds they are missing him, they can relive those great moments. It's all in there, the man, the memories, the personality." (Cat:"The Ego!") "Yes I had to scale that down quite a bit."
- Kryten ("Blue")

The Rimmer Experience was an Artificial Reality or Total Immersion Video Game program created aboard Starbug by Kryten in the Series VII episode "Blue" to cure Lister of his feelings of nostalgia towards the now departed Rimmer. ("Stoke Me a Clipper")

Kryten was attempting to outdo Kochanski's more direct, less grandiose approach of just talking to Lister. It involved Lister, Kochanski, Kryten and Cat sitting in a car that moved slowly through the ride. As Kryten stated, "It's all here, the man, the memory, the personality and the ego" which was scaled down quite a bit. The exhibits were created from Rimmer's diary which provided a distorted account of events.



The car moves through a door with "The Rimmer Experience" on it and then it comes to a stop shortly after with Rimmer facing them, giving his version of the Space Corps Salute before making his introduction to Lister, Kochanski, Kryten and Cat:

"Welcome to the Rimmer Experience, a place of wonder, excitement and...wonder. You will experience some heroic events which some might not attribute to any living person, but then again, Arnold J. Rimmer was a deeply remarkable man."

Then the car moves forward with Rimmer's voice continuing the narration.

Exhibit #1

"Being the driving force of the Red Dwarf mission, the fearless Rimmer has to dice with death on a daily basis..."

Lister being confused with this, shouts out "What?!"

"Sometimes it takes a strong mind and cool nerves to hold the crew together."

A mock-up of the Starbug cockpit has simulated versions of Lister, Rimmer, Kryten and Cat with a version of Rimmer dressed in Admiral uniform. Kryten warns the others that there is an asteroid belt ahead, Rimmer correct him saying that they are fragment of a dying star, Kryten then wonders how he could make such a mistake, with Cat and Lister then say they are scared with Lister shouting out that someone saves them before he "wets his kecks". In a deleted scene, Rimmer slaps some sense into Lister and he takes over saving them with the others cheering him.

The real Lister watches this and tells Kochanski that event never happened, as they proceed towards the next exhibit, Lister says it's making him sick, although it isn't the ride, it's what he's seeing in it. They then stop again.

Exhibit #2

In a mock-up of the Starbug kitchen, Rimmer is giving Cat fashion tips (much to the real Cat's fury). Cat then tells Lister that Rimmer is a nice guy and they couldn't imagine life without him, Lister says that he owed his life to him giving a huge smile. In a deleted scene, the real Lister says that he didn't owe him the time of day. Kryten comes in and says that Rimmer thinks quicker than he does (the real Kryten realizing that this entry of Rimmer's diary is "criminal libel""). Then Lister eats curry and reacts in agony, Rimmer then takes it from him and eats it without discomfort, saying "the spicier, the better for me."

The real Lister at this point wants to get off the ride, then Kryten tells him of the "best bit" as the car starts moving.


The Rimmer Munchkin Song starts playing, praising Rimmer, with smaller puppet-like versions of Rimmer singing, near the end of it, the car has a sudden burst of acceleration and then it moves at it's normal slow pace as the ride ends.


The car moves through doors with "toodle pipski" written on them and then stops. Lister has finally had enough of Rimmer's lies and boasting and angrily shouts out, "I never want to see or hear from that scum-sucking, lying, weasel-minded smegger in my entire life!"

Kryten then quips, "Sigmund Freud eat your heart out!", feeling that the ride has been a success.



The Rimmer experience - Red Dwarf - BBC comedy

The complete Rimmer Experience


  • The Rimmer experience was originally much longer. Extended scenes can be seen on the special features on the Series VII DVD (see deleted scenes for "Blue")